A New Year of Parenting

I have to be honest. A new year of parenting scares the daylights out of me. That's because 2009 is the year that I become a parent. As excited as I am, it means that I have to put myself out there and actually try the things that I suggest to other people. Luckily, I don't have a teenager yet so I have a number of years to prepare for that. That doesn't have anything to do with this post but I thought I would throw it out there anyways.

So you are the parent of a teen. Let me first say that I'm praying for you. Raising a teen is usually a difficult thing to do. To quote comedian Jeff Allen, "teenagers are God's way to teach adults a lesson. It lets parents know what it's like to create something in their own image only to have them grow up and deny their existence."

Sometimes parenting feels like that...ok a lot of the times, parenting feels like that. I want to take this time to encourage you in this new year of parenting. I've spent time listening to teens and evaluating where they are. I want to take this post to write some practical thoughts on raising teens to have a christian worldview. A couple of things before I get started. I don't have a teen. I understand that. I spend a lot of time with teens and I listen to them to see how and what they are thinking. So I use that to guide my thoughts. Secondly, each child is different. Use that discretian while reading.

Some Practical Ideas

1. Stress the importance of Church- I know that since I'm a pastor I'm required to say that. Here's the thing. Students are often graduating from High School and Church at the same time. Once teens get to college they don't understand the importance of a community of fellowship and worship. 18 and 19 year olds are dropping out of church at an alarming rate. Part of my job is to help teenagers understand the importance of a regular time of worshipping God with a community of believers. I also didn't say what church. Your child might not fit in at HRBC. We do everything we can to help everyone feel welcome, but sometimes teens just click at other churches. I understand that and I try not to cry in public about it. If your teen is interested in attending youth or worship at another church, that's fine. I would say for you to check out the church and that it is a strong Bible teaching church that doesn't only put on fun events.

2. Stress the importance of slowing down. One of the biggest hurdles I see that can prevent a teen from growing in their faith is that they are overburdened with school work, sports, jobs, extracurriculars, .etc. I once had a student who took so many AP classes that he ran out of time doing his homework....I mean literally ran out of time. As in he got home from track practice started homework, ate dinner, and then pulled an all nighter until he had to go to school the next day. He didn't stop working and still ran out of time. I think this is a larger problem than parents are aware of. It's tough for parents because all parents want their children to succeed in life. Let me ask this. "What's the point of material success if it forfeits spiritual growth?" Granted the teen got into a great college but they are now spiritually dead. I'm not saying don't stress hard work. That's importance as well. I'm saying that the most important thing is balance. Students who are stressed out are more likely to look to bad habits (drinking, smoking, sex) to relieve the stress complicated by a busy life. Slowing down help promotes balance in a teens life.

3. Be an example- You are the number one spiritual factor in your child's life, like it or not. What you do, they are likely to do. If you want your child to grow spiritually, you much first take the opportunities to grow spiritually yourself. Pray with your family. Dig into God's word. Love your family. Seek God. When your teen sees this, they are more likely to follow in your footsteps and seek God as well. This is by far the toughest for anyone. We are role models whether we like it or not.

This is just a glimpse into some parenting ideas that could help your teen grow closer to God. Let me know your thoughts or opinions by clicking the comments link below!